Note: this is verbatim original text, except for one comment removed out of respect for my bride.
Enjoy the rerun:
1. Kalyne and I have been together for more than half of our lives.
2. I like to do things for people without them knowing it was me or evening knowing that it was done.
3. My girls amaze me. I am so excited to watch them grow but wouldn't dare wish for it to not happen too quickly. The world is a better place because they are in it.
4. I grew up in a fairly conservative Jewish household; I was bar mitzvah’d, kept kosher (didn’t eat a cheeseburger until I was in high school), can still read Hebrew, and can tell the hell out of the Channukah story to a kindergarten class.
5. Kalyne’s brother once took me to his high school English class as a “Jew” show and tell. His class was reading Diary of Anne Frank and when the sheltered Idahoans started asking questions about Judaism (not really a very strong Jewish community in Pocatello), Benjy raised his hand and said “I know a Jew.” Best question from one of the students: “Why are Jews so greedy?” Ahhh, silly sheltered closed-minded future Klansmen of South Eastern Idaho - so charming.
6. Most people wouldn’t guess the quantity and size of the tattoos I have.
7. I race a stock car (1989 Honda Prelude) at the local race track with three of my brother-friends. Look for 4 Brother Racing team to break into NASCAR in 2012.
8. I was Pre-Med in college and my first career was an EMT - from which I burned out by age 25.
9. I didn't graduate college until I was almost 30 and neither the completion of my degree nor my age when I finished it has had any impact on my professional career in the slightest thus far. I’ve achieved more by honing in on my bullshitting skills and learning when to shut up and nod - It is how I transitioned from gurney jockey to instructional designer consultant (without any formal ID training) to a senior program manager at a Fortune 50 company.
10. That said, I am seriously contemplating getting my MBA.
11. I play piano – but I only play for myself. I don’t even like to play when the girls are home.
12. Olives taste like dirt.
13. Kalyne and I agree on nearly everything… except movies, music and the aforementioned olives.
14. I have some regrets about my college career choices and wish I had taken more advantage of the opportunities and freedoms available to me at that time, however I have a pretty fantastic life so I don't pine too heavily.
15. Surfing is my sanctuary – not necessarily my only sanctuary, but a reliable one. It is a shame that I can't get out as much as I used to. It is cathartic, zen and grounding for me… and therefore keeps Kalyne from calling me words that rhyme with “Lucky Grass-bowl”.
16. Now that we have lived in Santa Cruz for the last 8 years, living away from the ocean is a deal-breaker for me.
17. I would love to someday build a house with my own hands.
18. I’ve thought about running for public office but wouldn't dare do that to my family.
19. Lip smacking/licking sounds are like nails on a chalkboard to me, which doesn't bode well for my girls when they are eating dinner or when my dogs have an itchy asshole.
20. I believe in karma
21. “Terrible-Twos” is a farce; they aren’t so bad. “Throttle-Me Threes” makes me contemplate becoming a cutter.
22. Kalyne says I was born to teach…and I can’t say I disagree. I expect I will someday be Professor Jay.
23. I am humbled and thankful for my amazing wife as my partner every single dingle day.
24. Sometimes I think I am really fucking funny.
25. A perfect day would be:
- Waking up when my body is done sleeping – not when someone/something else decides its time to wake up
- Big meat-filled breakfast with kickass coffee, sitting with the girls in their PJ’s
- Going for a two-hour surf session on a clean, head-high, southwestern swell day (70 degree air temp)
- Take a long shower
- Family head out for a fun beachside lunch or maybe Betty’s (if you haven’t yet, gotta try Betty’s Burgers on Seabright in Santa Cruz)
- Go on an adventure with the fam
- Come home to a Publisher’s Clearinghouse sweepstakes van at my front door
- Delicious dinner for two with Kalyne
- Meet some friends for a few drinks
- Go home for some romance: candles, featherbed and a mountain of cocaine… just checking to see if you are still paying attention.